It's not every day an email lands in your inbox called "weird sex stuff", so obviously I had to click it. God, how did a story about a braless throat chakra tuning forks get me all in my feels man. It took me an extra 30 minutes to get dressed yesterday because my Old Navy midi dress had me feeling like a tramp. As we all know, Old Navy is known for their slutty get ups so you can just imagine what the dress was like. Over here popping a tank top underneath it for ~modesty~ so nobody confuses the historic house I was visiting with a brothel. Why are we like this!?
omg I hope it's not weird that this comment made me both laugh and tear up LOL. Not a dress from that sex shop, Old Navy!!! Something about imagining someone else out there in the world examining their midi dress for appropriateness...it makes me feel so tender. at the same time, there's a strange relief in hearing that I'm not the only one who thinks this way--thank you, Gabriella <3 we're just doing our best, you know?? that's why I feel tender--we're just trying so hard to be good. i have a lot of compassion for that. but I want to redefine "good" to be more aligned with personal values and agency. Please DM me if you get the courage to wear the midi dress tank top-less...I think it would look great & I'm rooting for you!!
I love this! also fuck what other people think, more than half dont even like themselves. also free the nips, please! i was born in 1989, and raised catholic and after i got fired from Victoria Secret in 2017, I havent worn a bra since and its been amazing!
The catholic church taught me some beautiful things! .....and then there's the other half it taught me, which I am desperately trying to unlearn, lol. you will LOVE wordhippo!
I relate so heavily to this! To this day I feel scandalous and get self conscious when I don’t wear a bra because of my religious upbringing/purity culture and it’s kind of sad, it’s like an internal issue for sure but from an external cultural stigma.
Nursing in public is kind of what made me heal from that honestly because I had to learn to be like “yeah I have nipples what of it, I’m literally feeding a human with my body it’s your problem if you’re sexualizing my body against my consent, not mine” in my own head of course I never said that to anyone haha 😂 because people were generally cool with it and just look away if they can’t handle it. that’s what was helpful for me anyways and sounds like that is what you are learning to do too, to retrain your own mind on it and working in security in yourself! Love this so much thank you for posting, I felt very seen and understood from this. 🙏🏽💖
Love this perspective!! Another empowering moment gifted by motherhood <3 my mom breastfed my younger sisters anytime, anywhere and I'm so grateful I grew up seeing that. Thank you for reading and commenting, Liz!!
as someone who was raised catholic & almost never wears bras anymore, the acceptance Can happen. it's weird & other people's perceptions are still quite bothersome but, there is nothing offensive or shocking about boobs!
right?? It's much easier to understand logically than it is in the body, unfortunately. But I totally believe acceptance can happen and I'm so glad you've found it!
love this, and it reminds me of when i started feeling really self-conscious and bad about going to Home Depot with no underwear on. why is it so weird and fucked up to have a body!
Oh my gosh I loved this!!! I was laughing along to some of it but only because I so get it!! The way we scrutinize our appearance and are so AWARE all the time even when we don’t realize it!
Also thank you for the reminder of word hippo I had totally forgotten about that!! I know what you mean about being so in the manuscript that it consumes you in a way that just feels GOOD. That’s how I feel about mine!
lollll like you kinda have to laugh at it but also--it's awful!! I'm grateful to be in a place of challenging that mindset...I don't want to live this way anymoreeeeee why am i afraid of my own bodyyyyy!!
so exciting to hear that you're in a similar place with your novel!!! It's fun, right? <3
i felt scandalous seeing this in my email, i thought i was getting spammed or something but i guess we all are obsessed with boobs? its this weird thing about being a woman and feel like you’re almost over sexualizing boobs which makes me think about the fact that i’m no better than a man but really, nobody really cares about what they are seeing… okay that’s lie they do but in reality, nobody has the guts to type it out and if they do it’s usually on instagram where the 50 year old men linger in a woman’s comment section (still can’t figure out how they get there?) i love your point though about how you perceive things isn’t how everyone perceives them, because of the time what we overthink about is the last thought in anyone’s mind <3 i’m happy you found your realization and confidence in that, please never be scared of who you are or what you would like to express to the world.. do it for you
Hahahaaaa it was kind of a scandalous clickbait but I'm so glad you read it and found more than just weird spam <3 and yes totally, i am constantly overthinking and assuming i'm the main character of everyone's lives...smh. Thank you for these sweet words of encouragement nikki !!
In a culture that is stripping us of our body autonomy and reproductive rights, demonizes our bodies and bans us from social media, that criminalizes our divine sexual power, it is not only appropriate, but necessary for women to fight against oppression any way we can. If that's going braless, so be it. I've had to archive much of my creative work on IG and I'm still "shadow banned" . Men's nipples are okay but women's aren't? Wtf? That's what feels inappropriate to me. On IG jenny.manhattan.milf (I write about grief, sex and the year after my husband died of caner in 2021).
Loved this and the dissection of who you're actually afraid of on social media (answer: the adults). I always feel scared when I post a picture of myself with my lack of a bra showing, like there are adults in a room judging me and discussing it without me knowing...
Right? It's exhausting. And so weird that we don't self-identify as "adults" lol, like the topic of our bodies/sexuality/purity culture/whatever it is just immediately reverts us back to feeling like children, or like "someone out there" knows better than us. sigh. Thanks for reading <3
I am proud. You are getting to the point of doing for you. Not what others think or say. You are a good writer. Thank you for sharing. Everything you said was right on. It shouldn't matter , you do for you. Some will like it, some won't. You got your point out and I applaud you. Great job. Ready for more to come as I catch up on your other works.
I have the obsession with visible nipples too! I think it's not weird, in that it's common, but it is weird, because look at what the stupid patriarchy made me think...
the stupiiiiddddd patriarchyyyyyy strikes again!! honestly very cool to see all the solidarity in the comments section but also sad that so many of us spend our precious time and energy worrying about this </3
Omg! Your last paragraph about getting to know your characters is crazy cool. Also I love this piece. I also always think my boobs are the main character when really no one cares 💀🙌
LOL that made me laugh fr I really am making my boobs the main character. i should prob focus on like, the actual main character in my actual novel draft lol. and tysm, it really is so cool to reach this point in the writing process of being so IN IT!
It's not every day an email lands in your inbox called "weird sex stuff", so obviously I had to click it. God, how did a story about a braless throat chakra tuning forks get me all in my feels man. It took me an extra 30 minutes to get dressed yesterday because my Old Navy midi dress had me feeling like a tramp. As we all know, Old Navy is known for their slutty get ups so you can just imagine what the dress was like. Over here popping a tank top underneath it for ~modesty~ so nobody confuses the historic house I was visiting with a brothel. Why are we like this!?
omg I hope it's not weird that this comment made me both laugh and tear up LOL. Not a dress from that sex shop, Old Navy!!! Something about imagining someone else out there in the world examining their midi dress for appropriateness...it makes me feel so tender. at the same time, there's a strange relief in hearing that I'm not the only one who thinks this way--thank you, Gabriella <3 we're just doing our best, you know?? that's why I feel tender--we're just trying so hard to be good. i have a lot of compassion for that. but I want to redefine "good" to be more aligned with personal values and agency. Please DM me if you get the courage to wear the midi dress tank top-less...I think it would look great & I'm rooting for you!!
I love this! also fuck what other people think, more than half dont even like themselves. also free the nips, please! i was born in 1989, and raised catholic and after i got fired from Victoria Secret in 2017, I havent worn a bra since and its been amazing!
HAHA oh what a wonderful story of liberation!!
I relate to so much of this post. The Catholic church really does a number on you. Looking forward to checking out wordhippo!
The catholic church taught me some beautiful things! .....and then there's the other half it taught me, which I am desperately trying to unlearn, lol. you will LOVE wordhippo!
YOUR MOMENTUM INSPIRES ME also great boobs
This is going to be you soon!!! <3 & tysm I'm coming around to them...you already know your boobs inspire me :')
I relate so heavily to this! To this day I feel scandalous and get self conscious when I don’t wear a bra because of my religious upbringing/purity culture and it’s kind of sad, it’s like an internal issue for sure but from an external cultural stigma.
Nursing in public is kind of what made me heal from that honestly because I had to learn to be like “yeah I have nipples what of it, I’m literally feeding a human with my body it’s your problem if you’re sexualizing my body against my consent, not mine” in my own head of course I never said that to anyone haha 😂 because people were generally cool with it and just look away if they can’t handle it. that’s what was helpful for me anyways and sounds like that is what you are learning to do too, to retrain your own mind on it and working in security in yourself! Love this so much thank you for posting, I felt very seen and understood from this. 🙏🏽💖
Love this perspective!! Another empowering moment gifted by motherhood <3 my mom breastfed my younger sisters anytime, anywhere and I'm so grateful I grew up seeing that. Thank you for reading and commenting, Liz!!
as someone who was raised catholic & almost never wears bras anymore, the acceptance Can happen. it's weird & other people's perceptions are still quite bothersome but, there is nothing offensive or shocking about boobs!
right?? It's much easier to understand logically than it is in the body, unfortunately. But I totally believe acceptance can happen and I'm so glad you've found it!
love this, and it reminds me of when i started feeling really self-conscious and bad about going to Home Depot with no underwear on. why is it so weird and fucked up to have a body!
LOLLLLL kinda love that vibe tho
Oh my gosh I loved this!!! I was laughing along to some of it but only because I so get it!! The way we scrutinize our appearance and are so AWARE all the time even when we don’t realize it!
Also thank you for the reminder of word hippo I had totally forgotten about that!! I know what you mean about being so in the manuscript that it consumes you in a way that just feels GOOD. That’s how I feel about mine!
lollll like you kinda have to laugh at it but also--it's awful!! I'm grateful to be in a place of challenging that mindset...I don't want to live this way anymoreeeeee why am i afraid of my own bodyyyyy!!
so exciting to hear that you're in a similar place with your novel!!! It's fun, right? <3
I know it!! But like you said it's so built in! Even things like crossing my arms over my stomach are just second nature. It's messed up!
SO FUN!!!! :D
i felt scandalous seeing this in my email, i thought i was getting spammed or something but i guess we all are obsessed with boobs? its this weird thing about being a woman and feel like you’re almost over sexualizing boobs which makes me think about the fact that i’m no better than a man but really, nobody really cares about what they are seeing… okay that’s lie they do but in reality, nobody has the guts to type it out and if they do it’s usually on instagram where the 50 year old men linger in a woman’s comment section (still can’t figure out how they get there?) i love your point though about how you perceive things isn’t how everyone perceives them, because of the time what we overthink about is the last thought in anyone’s mind <3 i’m happy you found your realization and confidence in that, please never be scared of who you are or what you would like to express to the world.. do it for you
Hahahaaaa it was kind of a scandalous clickbait but I'm so glad you read it and found more than just weird spam <3 and yes totally, i am constantly overthinking and assuming i'm the main character of everyone's lives...smh. Thank you for these sweet words of encouragement nikki !!
In a culture that is stripping us of our body autonomy and reproductive rights, demonizes our bodies and bans us from social media, that criminalizes our divine sexual power, it is not only appropriate, but necessary for women to fight against oppression any way we can. If that's going braless, so be it. I've had to archive much of my creative work on IG and I'm still "shadow banned" . Men's nipples are okay but women's aren't? Wtf? That's what feels inappropriate to me. On IG jenny.manhattan.milf (I write about grief, sex and the year after my husband died of caner in 2021).
"It's not only appropriate, but necessary" -- LOVE that!
Loved this and the dissection of who you're actually afraid of on social media (answer: the adults). I always feel scared when I post a picture of myself with my lack of a bra showing, like there are adults in a room judging me and discussing it without me knowing...
Right? It's exhausting. And so weird that we don't self-identify as "adults" lol, like the topic of our bodies/sexuality/purity culture/whatever it is just immediately reverts us back to feeling like children, or like "someone out there" knows better than us. sigh. Thanks for reading <3
I am proud. You are getting to the point of doing for you. Not what others think or say. You are a good writer. Thank you for sharing. Everything you said was right on. It shouldn't matter , you do for you. Some will like it, some won't. You got your point out and I applaud you. Great job. Ready for more to come as I catch up on your other works.
As usual, I can relate to one of your posts.
<333
I have the obsession with visible nipples too! I think it's not weird, in that it's common, but it is weird, because look at what the stupid patriarchy made me think...
the stupiiiiddddd patriarchyyyyyy strikes again!! honestly very cool to see all the solidarity in the comments section but also sad that so many of us spend our precious time and energy worrying about this </3
Omg! Your last paragraph about getting to know your characters is crazy cool. Also I love this piece. I also always think my boobs are the main character when really no one cares 💀🙌
LOL that made me laugh fr I really am making my boobs the main character. i should prob focus on like, the actual main character in my actual novel draft lol. and tysm, it really is so cool to reach this point in the writing process of being so IN IT!
On sex— I used to & still do lie about not being a virgin bc I feel embarrassed about having had sex . Which is not a good feeling to have at all!
It’s weird the things you’re taught to hate about yourself because you’re a woman